a thoughtful web.
Good ideas and conversation. No ads, no tracking.   Login or Take a Tour!
comment

There are friends that get more out of our friendship than I do. There are friends that get less. Most of the time these states ebb and flow - that's what friendship is, I think. There are times when you lean on others and there are times when others lean on you.

I've recently come to the conclusion that one of my oldest friends - perhaps my oldest friend - consistently gets more out of me than I get out of him. In fact, that his friendship is usually draining on me. Sometimes, so draining that I do not wish to be friends with him anymore. However, I reached this conclusion in '93, '97, '02 and '08 so it's demonstrably cyclical. I make my piece with it and move on. He's my friend.

I'll say this: if you select your friends by what they can do for you, your friends will select you for what you can do for them. And all of you will be very, very lonely.