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_refugee_  ·  3755 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: On Suicide, Depression, & Other Thoughts

I think that wanting it to sound as if you are speaking translates, in written format, to addressing the audience casually and familiarly, and I think this writing achieves that.

I would encourage you to continue working on it until you are satisfied with it. I thought it was a good work, but I'd be interested to see your "even better" version of it as well.