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steve  ·  3831 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: The preventable, inevitable death

A lot of young people have an invincible complex - that is to say they do death defying things because they think they won't die.

When I was young I did some ridiculously dangerous things, but I think it was because I didn't worry about death. I don't know why, but I don't think I have ever feared it. I worry about death a little more now - but even now, it's really more about what it would do to my wife and children that gives me any reservations.

I've spent the last three days visiting the bedside of a friend who is in her final days. She is washing in and out of consciousness. Her breathing is getting more difficult. Last night they started the morphine. I don't think she'll be alive when I go this evening. She is surrounded by family. Other friends like me have been visiting. When she comes around… she just smiles. She cracks a joke. Yesterday after a long period of unresponsive haze, only showing a slight signal of "no" to a nurse asking if she was hungry, she blinked a little, then looked at me with laser like focus and said "I WOULD like some tapioca."

I don't think she fears death right now. She seems very peaceful (even before the morphine). I think her peace comes from living a very full life. A happy marriage. A few successful small businesses. Several kids. Serving in her community and church. Countless friends. ok… rambling thoughts over.