The problem is that there needs to be a balance between blaming the victims and holding males responsible for their actions. Of course we should all be responsible. Of course we should take preventative measures. But why is there such a disparity between girls being responsible and rapists being held responsible? Why are men not being told not to rape but there always seems to be an article on the frontpage with young girls taking the blame?

A recent slew of articles and events blaming rapes on the drunk underage high school girls rather than the high school wannabe football stars was the starting point for this piece. Here's one. Here's another. Here's another.

There are two sides: We need to be defensive to help curb or prevent crime and to protect ourselves. But we also need to not hurt others. You can't just teach defensive maneuvers and expect society's problems to go away. We need to teach both. We need to talk about both.

in middle school classes in 1993 where they were lecturing all of us about "no means no"

For what it's worth, I just did a quick survey of the five 20-25 year old guys in my office right now and none were taught not to rape in school.